Access All Areas: Stories From a Hard Rock Life by Scott Ian

Author:Scott Ian [Ian, Scott]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Biography, Autobiography, Personal Memoirs, Music, Heavy Metal
ISBN: 9780306825231
Google: 8xO-DgAAQBAJ
Amazon: 0306825236
Publisher: Hachette UK
Published: 2017-12-12T00:00:00+00:00

MADONNA

“Scott, Scott!”

Some woman was yelling my name from down the block on 53rd Street in New York City. I was standing outside the back door of the Roseland Ballroom with a bunch of friends after a Rancid show in October 1994. I kind of recognized the voice and could see by the stunned looks on some of my friend’s faces (they could see over my shoulder) that it was someone serious. I generally don’t turn around when someone is randomly calling my name from down the block, so I kept talking to my friends, and then again I hear her calling, “Scott, come over here!” By now my friend’s eyes were bugging out of their heads. My curiosity piqued, I turned around to see Madonna standing next to a limo, waving me over. I calmly turned back around to my friends, playing it cool, acting like it was no big deal. Oh, it’s just Madonna calling me over by my name to her limo, it happens every day, no big whoop. My poker face was holding on like the Alien face-hugger because on the inside I was having a full-on, pulse-pounding fuckaroo of a freak-out! H o l y c r a p i t ’s M a d o n n a h o l y c r a p i t ’s M a d o n n a h o l y c r a p i t ’s M a d o n n a h o l y c r a p i t’s M a d o n n a and she is calling. ME. OVER. TO. HER. CAR. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

My friends were looking at me like I was nuts, and one of them said, “Dude, what are you waiting for? Get over there!”

I told them I’d be right back and tried to walk over as casually as possible, like I wasn’t walking over to Madonna, standing next to her limo, waving at me, and calling my name. I could feel my friend’s eyes on me as I approached her, my brain trying to deal with the mind-fuck of how do I greet her?

We had actually hung out once before, but this was Madonna. What do I do? Can’t just shake hands. Do I presume there will be a hug? Will we be some high-fiving motherfuckers? Maybe a Euro-style double-cheek kiss?

Nope.

She grabbed me and pulled me into her arms and gave me a big fat smacker RIGHT ON THE MOUTH. Then she took my hand and pulled me into the back of the limo.

My mind was reeling…

She just kissed me and she’s holding my hand and pulling me behind her into the car holycrapholycrapholycrap did my friends see all of this? (YES!) What is happening? Are we about to…

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